Saturday, July 28, 2012

Update 7/28

The afternoon following the last post, I spoke with my neurologist at length.
Turns out that he misunderstood the severity of my conditions when I originally called him almost 2 months ago. He requested I start IV steroids immediately but due to finances (and partly the needle thing) I declined and opted for Prednisone... again. Fourth of fifth time in just over a year that I have been on it.

And if taking roids wasn't enough for my body to deal with.. I quit smoking last weekend. I have been a pack a day smoker for many years. Dropping them here and there for a couple months at a time, but I have been a pack a day for five or six years straight. Anytime I have quit has always been cold turkey including this time.
I have been wanting to quit for a long time. Its obviously unhealthy, it stinks, its expensive, its fucking awesome and will miss it.

I have been in withdrawals, headaches daily, body temp rises and muscles/nerves fuck up, and worst of all so far, not a decent shit has been taken...
I am in a very uncomfortable state where either due to no smoking or the steroids, my body does not want to take a shit.
I have been all over fiber and water (drink nothing but water anyways). Yesterday and today I have had once again, the fucked up experience of using suppositories (multiple types)...I don't know how adventurous people go there with anything... Each one has felt more demoralizing than the last. I essentially feel like I am raping myself.
Even with the suppository self-rape I have not been able to manage a solid flush.
I hope this does not end in a trip to a doctor....     

I will buy a pack of smokes before long if I don't feel any better and accept that I need a method to kicking this particular addiction.


  1. Glad to hear you quit smoking....but this really don`t sounds okay. Doesn`t sound like suppositories are good enough. Can you get mini-microlax at the pharmasist? And maybe they won`t work, then shouldn`t you see your doctor. And everything else...Are you taking steroids at home? Is that normal? Have you told them about the needle thing? Couldn`t that make it easier...? And...could your family help you with finances? Then you could get better treatment. Just thinking loudly. You shouldn`t deal with this on your own. I have been thinking a lot about you lately. You are on my mind.

    1. I had to use suppositories because the blockage had already occurred and softeners and laxatives do nothing but upset the stomach.

      Prednisone is an oral steroid to jump-start recovery but it can cause issues like liver damage (Gilenya already working on that).
      Its not as effective as the IV steroid Solu-Medrol, but there's a generic for it and it only costs me $3 using a local store pharmacy. IV would run hundreds for each visit to hospital.

      The needle phobia was discovered at the neurologist office when they have attempted to take blood. I have nearly passed out in their office as well as another doctors office.

      I have not asked for a single penny from any family since I started working at 15 and I don't plan on starting now.

      Pride really is not affecting my quality of life. My family in most cases are worst off financially than I am, there is simply no money.

    2. I am sorry to hear all that. I really hope prednisone is helping you as much as you need right now!! Let us know!

    3. Maybe there are some other things you can do. Have you tried a diet without gluten for a while? I will absolutely recommend it, at least for three weeks. And if it doesn`t halp, try to stay away from milk. I could send you links about gluten sensitivity, but I guess you are also a friend of google.
      And have you been tested for any thyreoidea illnesses. If not, then shame on your doctor!! And most of them don`t do it properly anyway. I can give you some advice if you want to get it tested. MS is one of the symptoms for thyreoidea illnesses, but doctors usually don`t think of that. I wish you would do this or something else that could help you get better!! I know it`s not easy to really do anything for yourself the way you feel, but I hope you keep trying!! Lots of love K

  2. Replies
    1. It fucks me, and I have to keep eye contact.

  3. If you do not like suppositories then one thing that works really well is Epson Salt (magnesium sulfate) which you can get from the supermarket. Heat some water until it is warm to hot and dissolve a teaspoon of the epson salt. It does not taste good so hold your breath and drink. Then have a few more glasses of water. This will often give a 'move' within 15 mins to 1 hr. If this does not work, then try it with 2 teaspoons the following day. But do not go overboard or it will give you diarrhoea.

    1. Thank you for the info, I remember being told of this lovely drink before. I have drank my share of sea water and its awful.
      I only turn to suppositories as a last resort. And usually at that point no softeners or anything I ingest with make a difference. The shit is pretty much rocks at that point I gather. You have to attack it from behind (pun intended).

      I have only had to use the suppositories twice and both times during an exacerbation.
      I will be proactive next time I have an exacerbation to start on softeners (natural or not) right away.