Quick update... stopped taking Gilenya on my own. Its not stopping the progression.
I have decided to give LDN (Low-Dose Naltrexone) a try. My neurologist and PCP refused to prescribe it to me. It was upsetting that my own neurologist wouldn't prescribe it. They said there is not enough data in the clinical trials to support its claim and that I would be taking the medication 'off-label'. Well assholes, you prescribed me Marinol at my request for spasms/spasticity and it is not designed for that, nor is there any fucking clinical studies. They trusted my word that THC works for me and they prescribed it hoping that it would ease my symptoms. If they had a thousand pens and notepads with LDN on them or some pharma rep with big tits selling it, then LDN would have prescribed.
After a week of calling around, I found a doctor that would prescribe LDN and didn't cost a fortune. Going to see an integrative medicine doctor on Monday and hope that they will prescribe me LDN. I have a local compounding pharmacy that I have checked in with. They make LDN and they send random samples of it out for inspection and quality control.
My depression has hit some new lows. Recent fights with the cellmate have been louder and more frequent. She has stated a desire to end this relationship. It is hard to say if we will move together at this point.
I still have not smoked cigarettes since I quit. It has been very difficult but I think I have it beat. I don't think the smoking has much to do with my attitude. I just really could use some space for a little bit. I need a vacation or something.
I am not the same person I was a year ago and I need to figure out who I am now. So far I really do not like him.
I will update a few days after LDN if I get to start it...
I like him!! I like that you keep trying even though your doctors are stopping you, that you quit smoking, that you keep writing, that you remind me of many things; like I am not alone in being alone. And when I don`t feel alone you remind me about what is important in life. Big words maybe, but very true. I wish more people would do what you are doing, put it into written words. I can partly imagine how you feel, and I am so sorry!! God luck with your LDN. I am also changing medicine btw. That is if my doctor let me. He didn`t last time I asked. I am going to ask harder this time.
ReplyDeleteTake care beautiful stranger!
K